Resolution & Compassion

Resolving Conflict at School

A concurrent thread that runs through teachers’ narratives of broken relationships, both between colleagues and between students, is the motion of unresolved conflict.

Dual concern model

Pruitt and Rubin outline the fallout of such conflicts as the dual concern model: concern for one’s own outcome and concern for the other side’s outcome.
It becomes a case in our minds of choosing one over the other and the Hunger Games in us always chooses our own because, on the whole, it seems that it is the better bet.

Conflict is necessary for change

Resolving conflicts means challenging normal processes and procedures to improve individual productivity or introduce innovative systems.
By challenging ideas, we can adapt them as more workable ideas in future. It is argued that conflict is necessary for change.

3 basic conflict strategies

Contending is an attempt to resolve the conflict on one’s own terms without regard for the other side’s interests.
Contentious tactics include threats, punishments, and pre-emptive actions.
Problem-solving strategies attempt to find mutually appealing solutions. Problem-solving tactics include making concessions and discussing underlying interests.

2 basic conflict strategies

Yielding is an attempt to reduce conflict by lowering one’s aspirations. Parties may choose to withdraw from a conflict.
Finally, they may choose to remain in the conflict but be inactive, waiting for the other side to make a move.

Advice when resolving conflict

Go out of your way to speak face to face with someone.
Remain objective in reference to opinions or conduct, interrogating the reality of the other party so that you understand how it may differ from your own.
Provide an alternative scenario that you feel would have been more pleasing for both parties. Consider the third option when resolving conflict as opposed to falling into a ‘me versus them’ stalemate situation that no one truly benefits from.

Advice when resolving conflict

Be time mindful: will you still mean what you want to say in an hour’s time? A day? When will what you want to say be best received: first thing in the morning, or just before home time? Are you the best person to deliver this message?
Tackle the most difficult conversation today: the most precarious conversations are the ones that warrant our attention the most.

1Conversation & Connection

1.1Email

1.1.1Physiological Impact of Email

1.1.2Appropriate Use of Email

1.2WhatsApp

1.2.1Damaging Impacts & Advice for WhatsApp

1.3Praise & Thank-Yous

1.3.1Giving Less Praise, Better

2Being Human: Effective Relationships in Schools

2.1Dealing with Colleagues, Roles & Resolution

2.1.1Choose Your Crowd

2.1.2Changing Hats

2.1.3Resolution & Compassion

2.2Creating Professional Safety Nets

2.2.1Create Something to Belong To

2.3Educational Leaders

2.3.1Problems with Leadership in Schools

2.3.2The Qualities of the Most Effective Leaders

2.4Connections in the Classroom: Student Systems

2.4.1Behavioural Systems

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